Normally, I have no problems with Dayton's behavior at home, with the exception of a few typical boy moments that happen when playing with his buddies outside.
We live in a beautiful condo complex that is in a park like setting, with an outdoor swimming pool and two playgrounds for the kids to play on. We're surrounded by trees, shrubs, and manicured lawns. We love living here, especially since everyone is so friendly. We walk patio to patio, joining others who live here for a game of yahtzee or play cards, or simply shoot the breeze. It's such a relaxing atmosphere, and it almost feels like we're camping in cottages at a resort, minus the maid service and beach. I've thought of buying a house, but Dayton and I love living here... I don't think either one of us want to give up the friends we've made and our easy access to them. All Dayton and I need to do is walk outside into our back yard, and his friends are sure to come out within minutes. If they don't, we walk ten steps to their door step and ring the door bell. The moms hang out and have coffee while the kids play. Living here has offered us plenty of interaction with others, a huge help for Dayton to practice some 'social skills' in the natural animal kingdom outside of school.
Dayton's made three really good after school buddies, and as a result of these friendships, I've managed to make friends with two of the moms, strong friendships that I cherish very much. One of the boys is the same age as Dayton and goes to a different school, another boy is two years older at eleven years old, and the third boy is turning seven at the end of the month. With exception of the eleven year old, the rest of the boys are crazy hyper, the youngest also being a wee bit on the 'mouthy' side. Gives me an insight as to why some species eat their young... The nine year old friend has been diagnosed with ADHD, and also has had troubles in reading and writing. The shared diagnosis makes the two of them understand each other very well. The two of them also get in the same kind of trouble with the rest of the kids...
So, last night, Dayton and the boys were playing hockey outside. For some reason 'unknown' to the rest of the kids, Dayton grabbed the nine year old's hockey stick and threw it over the fence surrounding the swimming pool. Of course, the boys got angry with Dayton... Next thing I know, my boy is climbing the fence... Holly crap! Naturally, I lost my ever living mind! The pool is covered with a tarp under which there is water. He could have fallen in, and of course I would have made thing worse by jumping in to save my baby... I can't even think about it, it just makes me sick.
Screaming and yelling and freaking out, I grounded Dayton without waiting to hear his explanation. Autism or not, impulse issues or not, ADHD or not, global delays or not, I've told Dayton many, many times to never, EVER climb the fence and jump over it. He's made the attempt before and I've always caught him in the act, but last night it was a friend that caught him, not me. She called my cell phone to alert me, knowing my cell is attached to my hip at all times. Dusk was upon us, making it difficult to see...
Freaking out I grabbed his hand and dragged him home, screaming at him how grounded he was and demanding to know what he was thinking, knowing all I would get is "I don't know," his usual answer (which naturally made me even angrier). Screaming like a banshee, totally freaking out, I told him to go to his room, get ready for bed and hand over the playstation. Grabbing the playstation, I left him in his room and walked away... What I really wanted to do was lay the smack down on his rootie-poo candy a$$.
Later on I found out that the nine year old stole Dayton's hard earned cash... $10.00 to be exact. The brat took Dayton's two $5.00 bills and gave one to the seven year old. The seven year old told Dayton about this, and Dayton lost it, grabbed the brat's hockey stick and threw it over the fence into the pool court yard, knowing it was locked and they couldn't get it back. The hockey stick's owner let Dayton know that he would get in trouble, because now an adult had to unlock the lock on the door to get his hockey stick. He suggested that since Dayton threw the hockey stick, he should go and get it to avoid getting in trouble. Terrified, Dayton then risked jumping the fence to get the hockey stick.
Argh... Dayton still climbed the fence... Even though I understand now why he did it, doesn't mean he should escape punishment, does it? Grrrrrr... The danger is very real. He could die. If I don't remain firm on the grounding, he'll do it again, not learning anything from this incident.
Making things even more interesting:
"Dayton, did you confront your buddy for taking your money?"
"Because he knew he stole from me."
"Did you tell him that YOU know that HE stole your money?"
"Dayton, does he know what made you throw his hockey stick over the fence?"
"Yes, because he stole my money."
"OK, but you said you didn't speak to him about him stealing your money."
"Then how does he know what made you throw his hockey stick..."
"'Cuz he knows he stole my money!!!"
I somehow have to get it through to Dayton that he needs to use his words, not act out... Two wrongs don't make a right. Any advice out there??? I could really use some!
It's gonna be a looooong weekend...
Consider yourselves hugged, and yeah, I'm stealing one for myself too,