Smell My Finger

Oy vey...  The boy has struck again.  Not sure what's happening with him, but it's been a rough week.  It doesn't help that I've got this horrible ear and sinus infection, I'm working more hours now (which I need now that I have a car payment), and the excitement around his birthday wreaked a wee bit of havoc too.

Monday:  Missed the school bus because I had overslept.  My ear weeping, head about to explode from the sinus pressure, I dizzily drag my butt into Dayton's room to wake him up.  He said 'no,' rolled over and tried to go back to sleep.  Of course as much as I would have loved to do the same, it just wasn't an option.  I rip the covers off the boy, put my hands over my ears and start singing.  At this point I should let you know that even if I could hear myself properly, I am completely tone deaf and can't sing.  The sound is somewhere between a screeching cat and a cheetah's growl.  It's just not pretty.  The boy finally gets up, and I drive him to school.

While getting ready for work, I get a phone call from Dayton's teacher.  She hears my voice and apologizes for calling, telling me she'll call another time, but I insist to hear what prompted her to call me in the first place.  I don't want to lose sleep over something that may not be a big deal...  Boy, was I wrong...

My darling babe refused to do his math work with his educational assistant, telling her he didn't have to listen to her, and that he wasn't doing his work.  He swore at her.  When that didn't make her stop asking him to work, he found a broken chair leg and started poking at her. And when that failed...  He stuck his fingers up his rectum...  Yes.  He did.  And then tried to touch her.  And then he tried touching everything in the room.  And then he proceeded to go do his milk monitoring job refusing to wash his hands until the principal got involved.

Pardon my French, but WHAT THE HELL?!  My first impulse was to spank the boy and ground him for life.  Really?  Seriously?

Of course, I decided that I wasn't going to talk to Dayton until I 'chilled out,' literally.  I was so hot from my fever, I opened the freezer door and stuck my head in it, not kidding.  I sat Dayton down and told him I knew what happened at school and that I was not impressed.  He had no explanation for me, just looked at me like I had that third eye growing out of my forehead again.  Finally he says to me "I was too tired to do math."

"You didn't think you should tell your aid this?!"
"She knew I was tired."
"How did she know this Dayton?"
"Because I was tired."
"But you didn't tell her that, did you?"
"No."
"Then how was she supposed to know you were tired?"
"Because I was tired (rolling his eyes at me now, making my blood pressure rise)!"
"Dayton, no one knows what's happening for you unless you TELL them, you really need to use your words.  There's no projector in your head announcing to everyone what you're thinking.  Not only that, but sticking your fingers up your butt, really?!  What made you think that was appropriate in any way?!"
"I dunno."
I hate I dunno.
"Dayton, from now on, you need to earn twelve magnets per week before you can play your playstation on the the weekends.  Your teacher will let me know if you've done your work during the morning and afternoon.  Each time you do your work for that period, you get a magnet."
"But momma!!!  I have a hard time getting ten magnets!  Twelve is impossible!!!"
"No, it's not impossible.  There are five days in a school week, and you can earn two magnets each day.  Count my fingers..."
MELTDOWN CITY.

Tuesday:  Dayton drags his butt around the house in the morning, not listening to me to get ready for school.  We miss the bus.  He's rude to his educational assistant, telling her someone 'taddled' on him to his momma, and now he's 'gonna have to pay.'  The teacher asks me if I know what Dayton means by this statement, and I explain to her about having to earn two extra magnets a week (completely attainable) to be able to play his playstation on the weekend.
"Dayton, you have no right telling off your aid.  You are not to speak like that to her again!"
"Yes momma."
"And why would you say that you 'have to pay?!  Do you have any idea what that sounds like?  Why not just tell her that you have to earn two extra magnets a week?"
"She knows I pay with magnets."
"Dayton, again buddy, you need to use your words.  People can't read your mind and have no idea what you're thinking!!!"
"She knows I pay for everything with magnets!!!"
"No she doesn't Dayton.  You need to explain your thoughts.  People don't know what you're thinking buddy!!!"
"YES SHE DOES!!!"
Argh.

Wednesday:  Dayton again won't get ready for school and we AGAIN miss the school bus.

Thursday:  We miss the school bus again because Dayton refuses to get ready when I ask him to, even when I threaten to make him walk to school if he misses the bus again.  We miss the bus.  This time I won't let him in the car and tell him to start walking.  He refuses to walk and starts hitting my new Sexy Rexy

Today:  We miss the bus, but not due to Dayton's trouble getting ready...  the bus came early.  I'm still sick and tired.  I'm still bothered about the butt thing.


Anyways, consider yourselves hugged y'all,

Lou