Dude, Where's My Bed?

A lot has happened since I last posted...  and I apologize for not continue blogging for this past month, but I've been a little busy packing moving and keeping my sanity.  Here's what's happening now...

To say that I'm exhausted is putting it mildly.  Chaos doesn't even begin to describe what my life has become this past month and a half, my summer is gone and the new school year is about to begin.  Where has time gone???  To the basement, literally...

Along with the titles of mother, housekeeper, cook, chauffeur, play mate, peace keeper, entertainer and nurse, you may now give me a well deserved title of carpenter AND painter.  Yeah, that's right.  I helped mud and paint the walls and I didn't even cry until the very last night when I stayed up until 2 am to paint, and until 3 am because I had to drive my girl home after she helped me finish painting.

The walls are up and painted, the bunk beds for the boys are set up, and our life with room mates begins...

We live in a large house, thank goodness as there are now two mothers, a 17 year old daughter, fifteen year old son with autism and ADHD, Dayton (ten years old with PDD-NOS, ADHD, global delays, OCD and ODD) and a 9 year old son, who's sharing the basement and bunking Dayton.

To say Dayton is struggling with the changes happening in our lives is putting it mildly.  Glen has left for work to another province for six weeks, and the boy is going through daddy withdrawals.  While I make sure Dayton gets to talk to his dad every day, it's just not the same as being able to see him and hang out with him.  Dayton's extremely hyper, unable to focus, angry, stubborn, and becoming more and more self focused every day.  Life is all about him now days, and it's driving everyone around us crazy.

Rules, rules and more rules.  Dayton has many rules including what game to play and when with our new room mates and then to top it all off, in the midst of a game, he has a routine to follow and the rest of the kids best follow suit or lose their heads.  Even my dear Lisa who's worked with Dayton for nearly 3 months now has tried her best to explain to the kids that Dayton is not used to sharing and that even at home he would play his playstation game in his bedroom while his dad played in the living room on line with him (dad's idea, not Dayton's, one of the many reasons I've had enough of our lives and decided to move).

Even through all the chaos, there is some good news in my health.  My blood pressure, without any blood pressure medication has stabilized.  Wow.  If I had any self doubts as to whether I've made the right decision of moving, they're all gone now.  I physically feel so much better, a wee bit tired from all the work behind us, and the work looming ahead of us, but I look forward to my new life.

Another change for my new life:  I start my new job today.  And yes, I'm working at another Shoppers Drug Mart pharmacy...  I'm a Shoppers girl, till death do us part.  I love my job and the company I work for.  Selling drugs legally has it's benefits :)


Consider yourselves hugged,

Lou

New Beginnings

Change is rough on anyone, but add autism to the mix and you've got a world of physical and mental anguish to deal with that sometimes make you want to succumb to their wishes.  Sometimes, but now always.

Dayton and I are moving out, something that's been a work in progress for a while now, but is just now coming to fruition.  Naturally, neither one of us is looking forward to packing it up, but it must be done.  And I'm sooooo tired...

My personal life has been very busy, and trying to please three households is a major task.  I'm really looking forward to sleeping uninterrupted until 8am tomorrow...  Work until 10pm, tuck Dayton into bed, go to my new place and crash until 8am...  That's the plan.  I can hardly wait, as just typing this simple post is making my eye lids so very, very heavy...  No amount of coffee is helping, so I'm now past tired and entering to zone of exhausted.

The big move is next Friday, so I really must start packing.  Pray the boxes don't disrupt Dayton too much.


Consider yourselves hugged,

Lou

Another One Bites The Dust

Ahhh yes, it's a tough week for Mr. Dayton.  Dayton's beloved educational assistant's last day of work was yesterday.  Today, he got to watch his grandma Karen move her belongings out of grandpa's home and leave for Colorado on her new life, and Big Mamma starts her new job on Monday.  Poor kid...

Hold up...  Did I say grandma Karen is leaving us?  Yes...  Even grandparents have marital issues.  Grandma Karen has been gone since September when her mom passed away, and today was the first time we've seen her since her terrible ordeal...  Losing a parent is never easy, no matter how old you are.

Dayton of course is confused...

Last night:  "Dayton, we're going to grandpa's tomorrow morning to help grandma move out.  I'd like to be there early, so I was thinking we'd get up at the same time we normally do to get ready for school and..."
"THERE'S NO SCHOOL TOMORROW!!!"
"I know babe, I was just saying that..."
"No, there's no school tomorrow, no, I'm not getting up early, no grandma moving out.  She has to stay."
"Babe, it's not up to us..."
"Her not have a choice, just like I don't.  No school tomorrow."
Ugh.

So off we went to grandpa's place this morning, only to be the last of the family to arrive.  Dayton's uncles and aunties were already there, and so was grandma Karen, who glanced at us and said:  "Oh good, there's more of you..."

I lost it.  I'm not proud of it, but remember how I was saying that a year ago, I would cry when someone hurt my feelings, or Dayton's feelings, and I would try to reason with the person as I am a people pleaser.  Now I've become Lou's evil twin Lola; not caring who I hurt, leaving a path of destruction behind me.  I snapped back at her:  "Well, you'd think you'd be happy to see your family again!"  She didn't speak to me again.

As I sat on the living room floor with the rest of the family, I felt completely uncomfortable.  So it seemed did grandma Karen.  She walked around the place like death warmed over.  I can't say I blame her, knowing that everyone present was there for grandpa; loyalty lines were drawn, and blood is thicker than water, right?  I felt a little bad for her.  But she did hurt my baby...

"Grandma's not gonna leave me mamma, she loves me."
"Babe, this has nothing to do with you.  This is stupid grown up stuff."
"Mamma, she loves me.  She told me she did."
"I don't think that's changed babe.  She does love you, but things have changed for her.  She has to go back home.  It's not about you, it's about her."
"Is this why Mrs. H. (his educational assistant) had to go too?  Stupid grown up stuff?"
"Pretty much babe.  Stupid grown up stuff."
"But you said you love me, and you never leave me mamma.  That's what you said."
"That's different babe.  Grandma does love you, and she is leaving, but she's not leaving you."
"How you say she not leaving me when she leaving?"
Grrrr...

So I lost my cool.  I'm not happy about it.  I'm especially not happy that my babe saw me lose my cool.  I'm not happy that our family's been turned upside down, and that Dayton's lost his grandma.

This twin sister Lola is not who I am.  I'm not this person, and I don't like her.

So, to try and put a smile on both our faces, Dayton and I had what we call 'family night.'  We played the little version of Cranium (totally love it, I've modified it to have our own version), tried to play some yahtzee, and then daddy came back to Winnipeg from The Pas...  The two of them are currently arguing over the MW3 video game.  Lovely.  I think I'm going to make it an early night tonight.

Calgon, take me away!


Consider yourselves hugged,

Lou